Saya kira napas lega itu akan benar-benar terhembus saat akhirnya Safir tidak menyusu selama 24 jam. Melakukan proses sapih ke anak yang 24 jam di hadapan itu ternyata tidak mudah. Awalnya dengan dalih sudah besar, proses menyusu itu diberi jarak. "Bambanya (nyusunya) nanti kalau malam" lalu "kalau ada ayah, ga bamba"--ayahnya selalu pulang saat anak-anak sudah tertidur jadi ini hanya berlaku saat akhir pekan. Hingga akhirnya proses 'bamba' itu tidak ada sama sekali.
Safir pun bukannya tanpa proses adaptasi. Saat hendak tidur siang karena hanya boleh 'bamba' saat malam, dia pun mencari cara. Tidur di dada hingga posisi andalan adalah memposisikan bibir saya tepat di pipi atasnya. Jadilah saya tidur dengan seonggok kepala keras nan berat (kepala Safir memang lebih besar dari Malika).
Setelah akhirnya seharian tidak menyusu, saya menantikan gelagat aneh. Saat proses sapih Malika memang lebih mudah. Hanya satu dua kali dia terbangun di tengah malam hanya untuk melihat puting sekejap dan kemudian tidur lagi. Sedangkan Safir? hmm ...
Sejak awal menyusu, Safir memang saya larang mentil. Tangannya tidak boleh sambil gerepe-gerepe puting lain. Jujur saja, badan saya cenderung bereaksi galak kalau digerepe-gerepe, apalagi sama ayahnya anak-anak :p. Jadi, saya sun saja tangannya. Eh, rupanya dia anggap itu pengganti aktivitas mentil. Dan sekarang saya menghadapi bocah yang ga bisa lihat Amynya duduk sama tinggi atau tidur-tiduran. Bawaannya mau pegang bibir. Dipencet-pencet kaya adonan klepon. Kalau ketemu komeda di sekitar bibir, dia akan serius mengoreknya. Terasa kulit bibir kering? Dia akan cabut semua hingga mulus a.k.a bibir saya perih semua. Kebayang kan pas puasa kemarin.
Dan bagi saya yang tangki cintanya bukan sentuhan, rasanya gatal seluruh kepala ketika harus lip service selama satu jam karena anaknya tidak kunjung bisa tidur. Hadooooh.
Pernah suatu malam saya marah. "Udah, jangan pegang-pegang lagi kenapa sih?" Safir nangisnya sedih banget (mungkin juga aksi manipulatif), "terus pegang apa, dong?" tanyanya sambil terus menangis. Aksi manipulatif berhasil. Ya suds, pegang pipi aja. Iya, pegang pipi, lama-lama merosot ke bibir juga.
Saat tertidur pun dia ternyata suka cari pegangan. Oleh karena biasanya saya sudah kabur dari sisinya, kakaknya kena ulah pula. Kalau sama ayahnya ga asik karena ada jenggot.
Tahu sih, kalau dia sudah mulai pegang-pegang artinya dia lagi bosan atau sedang ga enak hati. Cuma ya bete aja, lagi masak ditodong lip service. Emang gue cewe apaan?
Ah, sudahlah. setidaknya proses toilet trainingnya lumayan lancar dalam dua bulan ini. Guess, ga bisa dipaksakan semua berjalan baik, kan?
Meanwhile, harus berpikir cara lain untuk mengalihkan ketertarikannya itu. Semoga Amy yang malas ini diberi petunjuk
Tampilkan postingan dengan label Amy story. Tampilkan semua postingan
Tampilkan postingan dengan label Amy story. Tampilkan semua postingan
Rabu, 06 Agustus 2014
Senin, 07 Juli 2014
Amy's Story: Ternyata Dia Rindu Teman-temannya
Sudah hampir sebulan sejak Malika bagi rapor kelulusan playgroupnya dan kemudian memasuki masa postpone sekolah formal. Oleh karena kebetulan juga masa liburan sekolah, jadi ya Amy belum pakai jadwal belajar di rumah alias emang belum bikin. Homeschooling memang menuntut ibu yang rajin nan aktif juga gesit dan tetap ceria-kenapa juga gue milih yang susah gue aplikasiin ya?
Seminggu berlalu, Malika senang bisa libur. Ga usah sekolah lagi. Saya masih rutin bawa anak-anak main di taman. Pernah juga iseng bertiga pergi ke taman Honda, sekalian beli bahan kue. Lalu ikut Amynya antar kue ke Ampera, yah walau jadi muntah-muntah karena naik mobil AC pagi-pagi. Kebetulan di penghujung minggu itu, alias hari Jumatnya, teman sekolah Malika berulangtahun. Ambil spot di taman Green Palace, divisi apartemen betulan di Kalibata City. Jadi saya memang sejatinya tidak punya akses resmi ke sana. Berhubung ada yang ultah jadi bisa masuk deh. Area taman ini ada kolam renangnya. Oleh karena Malika dan Safir baru saja muntah-muntah di taksi, saya tidak bawa set nyemplung. Lagipula ada teman kuliah saya datang dari Belgia, masa saya sibuk pegangin anak-anak di kolam?
Toh, akhirnya pada main air juga. Ketika acara ulang tahun selesai, saya mengajak Malika pulang, ada banyak alasan selain supaya saya bisa punya waktu bersama teman saya, Malika dan Safir sudah biru bibirnya. Jadi yah emang harus pulang. Eh, rupanya si eneng protes. "Aku kan mau main sama teman-temanku. Masa ga boleh? Aku kan sudah lama ga main sama teman-teman. Amy niy, masa Malika disuruh main sama adek terus?"
Yaaah, ada yang curcol niy. Dan saya tiba-tiba terlihat seperti ibu yang mengisolasi anaknya. Habis gimana dong, di lorong tempat kami tinggal tidak ada yang punya anak kecil. Mau main ke tempat temannya ada di tower sebelah, yang artinya harus janjian dulu. Dan kebetulan orangtuanya baru ngurus anak kedua jadi yah ga enak sebenarnya menambah kerepotan. Kalaupun main di taman, entah kenapa pilihan waktunya selalu pas taman sedang sepi. Jadi yah faktanya, Malika emang cuma main sama Safir. Tapi emang itu ga cukup?
"Safir itu bukan temanku. Dia adikku. Safir kan tinggal di rumah aku. Kalau teman itu yang tinggal di rumah lain." begitu protesnya suatu kali saya hendak memisahkan dia dan temannya yang tak sengaja bertemu di taman.
Ya baiklah ratu cerewet, sepertinya kamu memang suka sekolah. Tapi sekolah main. Memang tepatnya saya bergabung di komunitas tertentu supaya anak-anak bisa bersosialisasi. Melakukan hubungan riil dengan orang lain. Eh tapi datang bulan puasa, semua klub kegiatan anak mungkin jadi berkurang. Sabar deh ya ... Sebulan lagi deeeh. Self reminder buat diri sendiri supaya lebih giat cari komunitas. Sementara itu, saya bikin daftar korban kunjungan. Cari tempat teman atau kerabat yang punya anak dan bisa dikunjungi di hari kerja. Baru satu sih, maklumlah kalau puasa itu Amy harus reschedule banyak hal (jadwal masak n ngantuk juga berubah) realisasi schedule main anak masuk prioritas ketiga. Akibatnya mereka jadi makin susah tidur dan makin aneh-aneh mainnya.
Saat beberapa hari lalu ketemu temannya lagi, saya traktirlah main di mal. Ga papa lah, asal jangan tiap hari. Bangkrut.
Akhir pekan lalu, karena kebetulan ayahnya ada pekerjaan tambahan di hari Sabtu, saya bisa mengunjungi salah satu teman saya. Oh, Malika senang banget. Ngoceh melulu sepanjang perjalanan naik kereta dan angkot. Dan kalimat yang terus dia ucapkan dari berangkat hingga pulang adalah, "Malika ga nyebelin, jadi Amy ga marah." "Kok Amy bisa ganti-ganti gitu ya? Bisa marah. Bisa baik." "kalau Malika ga nyebelin, Amy jadi baik deh."
Ok deh, kenapa gue terdengar buruk gitu ya reputasinya. Hadoooh. Anyway, masih ada setahun lagi yang harus saya jalani sendirian. Mudah-mudahan Amynya bisa terus semakin baik.
Seminggu berlalu, Malika senang bisa libur. Ga usah sekolah lagi. Saya masih rutin bawa anak-anak main di taman. Pernah juga iseng bertiga pergi ke taman Honda, sekalian beli bahan kue. Lalu ikut Amynya antar kue ke Ampera, yah walau jadi muntah-muntah karena naik mobil AC pagi-pagi. Kebetulan di penghujung minggu itu, alias hari Jumatnya, teman sekolah Malika berulangtahun. Ambil spot di taman Green Palace, divisi apartemen betulan di Kalibata City. Jadi saya memang sejatinya tidak punya akses resmi ke sana. Berhubung ada yang ultah jadi bisa masuk deh. Area taman ini ada kolam renangnya. Oleh karena Malika dan Safir baru saja muntah-muntah di taksi, saya tidak bawa set nyemplung. Lagipula ada teman kuliah saya datang dari Belgia, masa saya sibuk pegangin anak-anak di kolam?
Toh, akhirnya pada main air juga. Ketika acara ulang tahun selesai, saya mengajak Malika pulang, ada banyak alasan selain supaya saya bisa punya waktu bersama teman saya, Malika dan Safir sudah biru bibirnya. Jadi yah emang harus pulang. Eh, rupanya si eneng protes. "Aku kan mau main sama teman-temanku. Masa ga boleh? Aku kan sudah lama ga main sama teman-teman. Amy niy, masa Malika disuruh main sama adek terus?"
Yaaah, ada yang curcol niy. Dan saya tiba-tiba terlihat seperti ibu yang mengisolasi anaknya. Habis gimana dong, di lorong tempat kami tinggal tidak ada yang punya anak kecil. Mau main ke tempat temannya ada di tower sebelah, yang artinya harus janjian dulu. Dan kebetulan orangtuanya baru ngurus anak kedua jadi yah ga enak sebenarnya menambah kerepotan. Kalaupun main di taman, entah kenapa pilihan waktunya selalu pas taman sedang sepi. Jadi yah faktanya, Malika emang cuma main sama Safir. Tapi emang itu ga cukup?
"Safir itu bukan temanku. Dia adikku. Safir kan tinggal di rumah aku. Kalau teman itu yang tinggal di rumah lain." begitu protesnya suatu kali saya hendak memisahkan dia dan temannya yang tak sengaja bertemu di taman.
Ya baiklah ratu cerewet, sepertinya kamu memang suka sekolah. Tapi sekolah main. Memang tepatnya saya bergabung di komunitas tertentu supaya anak-anak bisa bersosialisasi. Melakukan hubungan riil dengan orang lain. Eh tapi datang bulan puasa, semua klub kegiatan anak mungkin jadi berkurang. Sabar deh ya ... Sebulan lagi deeeh. Self reminder buat diri sendiri supaya lebih giat cari komunitas. Sementara itu, saya bikin daftar korban kunjungan. Cari tempat teman atau kerabat yang punya anak dan bisa dikunjungi di hari kerja. Baru satu sih, maklumlah kalau puasa itu Amy harus reschedule banyak hal (jadwal masak n ngantuk juga berubah) realisasi schedule main anak masuk prioritas ketiga. Akibatnya mereka jadi makin susah tidur dan makin aneh-aneh mainnya.
Saat beberapa hari lalu ketemu temannya lagi, saya traktirlah main di mal. Ga papa lah, asal jangan tiap hari. Bangkrut.
Akhir pekan lalu, karena kebetulan ayahnya ada pekerjaan tambahan di hari Sabtu, saya bisa mengunjungi salah satu teman saya. Oh, Malika senang banget. Ngoceh melulu sepanjang perjalanan naik kereta dan angkot. Dan kalimat yang terus dia ucapkan dari berangkat hingga pulang adalah, "Malika ga nyebelin, jadi Amy ga marah." "Kok Amy bisa ganti-ganti gitu ya? Bisa marah. Bisa baik." "kalau Malika ga nyebelin, Amy jadi baik deh."
Ok deh, kenapa gue terdengar buruk gitu ya reputasinya. Hadoooh. Anyway, masih ada setahun lagi yang harus saya jalani sendirian. Mudah-mudahan Amynya bisa terus semakin baik.
Kamis, 06 Maret 2014
Between Kindergarten and Reading-Writing-Counting Course
Malika will be 4 years old this month and her playgroup will end up on June. A year earlier. It makes me confused, should I sign her in a kindergarten this year? But she is too young to go into elementary school after graduating her kindergarten. Or should I put her in a reading-writing-course before she goes to kindergarten next year?
I don't really into early school actually, but seeing how much Malika have learned in her playgroup, I feel bad if I take all the excitement that she has with her peer. Yes, what I am saying is the social benefit of going to school. Where she learned to have a social bound and learn to maintain it. That is why a kindergarten will be suit for her but she is too young.
While a reading-writing-counting course will make Malika keeps remember what she has learned at her PG. But, there is a doubt inside me. It's because the atmosphere. A course class is not an intimate class. Most of them are only about one student and one teacher. To study. No singing. No sharing food. No social bonding. Where kids are being reported for what they have achieved academically.
But I stay in the course option because it was way cheaper than a kindergarten and the course that I chosed was also teaches Iqra'. But then, I saw lots of articles about early education for kids on FB. I saw varieties of reactions from the parents. From the soft one to the hard one. It wasn't new for me, I myself am one of the supporter of teaching kids reading-writing-counting by the age of 7. Now, I don't know what should I choose.
To be honest, getting Malika and Safir into school is my way to keep positive to the kids. I need a space. But, seeing all these things, maybe I should rethink again. After tired of thinking, I started to talk about it to the father of the kids. As the donatur =).
And the conclucion is, Malika won't be at any of it. Malika herself has already a little brother as her sparing partner to face the world. People call it homeschooling. Guess, I need to arrange lots of activities so I won't get bored =D.
I don't really into early school actually, but seeing how much Malika have learned in her playgroup, I feel bad if I take all the excitement that she has with her peer. Yes, what I am saying is the social benefit of going to school. Where she learned to have a social bound and learn to maintain it. That is why a kindergarten will be suit for her but she is too young.
While a reading-writing-counting course will make Malika keeps remember what she has learned at her PG. But, there is a doubt inside me. It's because the atmosphere. A course class is not an intimate class. Most of them are only about one student and one teacher. To study. No singing. No sharing food. No social bonding. Where kids are being reported for what they have achieved academically.
But I stay in the course option because it was way cheaper than a kindergarten and the course that I chosed was also teaches Iqra'. But then, I saw lots of articles about early education for kids on FB. I saw varieties of reactions from the parents. From the soft one to the hard one. It wasn't new for me, I myself am one of the supporter of teaching kids reading-writing-counting by the age of 7. Now, I don't know what should I choose.
To be honest, getting Malika and Safir into school is my way to keep positive to the kids. I need a space. But, seeing all these things, maybe I should rethink again. After tired of thinking, I started to talk about it to the father of the kids. As the donatur =).
And the conclucion is, Malika won't be at any of it. Malika herself has already a little brother as her sparing partner to face the world. People call it homeschooling. Guess, I need to arrange lots of activities so I won't get bored =D.
Jumat, 31 Januari 2014
Amy's Story: Scheduling My Cellphone's Time
Go xi fa chai people =D
Well @kalibatacity feels like we are celebrating korean lunar new year (is it the same?). Anyway, after three new years in three months, I've finally decided what my resolution is. Yup, just one.
Actually I have plenty of them, but I prefer to announce just one resolution to the world.
My resolution for 2014 or whatever the latest year is to scheduling my cellphone's time. You may not know, but I used my phone to check my fb accound like hundreds of time in a day.
Am I famous? No.
Do I have lots of clients to be handled? No
Do I make money from it? Most of them, no.
And on the last new year eve, Malika told me and her father, "Ayah, stop smoking or you will be dead. Amy, stop playing around with your cellphone. play with me."
Bulls eye everybody.
It reminded me of one of the text of Melanie Subono that I edited a couple weeks ago. She wrote, Why do we bother to answer someone else outthere when you don't have any energy to give a nod, an answer to someone that sit in front of you?
Admit it, we do that for many time yet we are not the one who to be called gadget generation. Can you imagine what it would be when our kids grow bigger? Maybe an exactly the same scene as the movie Wall E.
I am not proud of my habit. Many times I asked myself:
"Why do you have to pretend to be busy with nothing, while you are the one who decided to resign from your office and said will use your time to take care your kids?"
"Why do you have to act busy with business when actually you haven't have that much demand either for baking nor editing? Why don't use your spare time with your kids before you are really busy with business?"
"Why do you have to open your social media account when you don't updating them?"
"Why ... ?" oh why ....
But that many times I also smile to my tought and continued tapping. This is a real bad habit.
These weeks I've tried to make my cell's time efficiently valuable. I actually love when I posted a blog and then reading people's comments, getting too excited to keep the trending. maybe I should hold it a little while. A pause moment for three hours, maybe?
And to make it valuable, I have to make sure that I do something that has something to do with the business. Not just becoming a passive internet geeks, not getting quite smarter but surely not being more popular or richer. Hey, you need to make a mark of your own, right?
Sometimes I used my cell as a denial. Especially when I got sleepy by the afternoon while the kids were still on fire. Just to make my eyes open, I kept busy with my cell. But unfortunately, it won't do for the kids because you are not BEING with them. They became even more brutal by this.
You are welcome to be late for any news, but don't be late to recognize what had/is/will happen/ed with your kids. Oh, I understand this sentence so much, but again in the name of denial or excuses I said to myself, "But sometimes I need a break!" Too bad I took a too long break. And still not feeling grateful about it.
Yes, grateful. I need to learn more about that. I should have feel grateful when I haven't had big business yet, so I can focusing myself with me and my kids. There are lots of mental homeworks to be accomplished. This is the time, maybe one day you will busy with business but at that time your kids might become your extra hand. =D
I know what my problem is, but too lazy too change it. I guess 'lazy' is the keyword for this year. No more laziness, Amy.
Keep the spirit. Burn it up! And run fast ... Beautifully ... And let your cells updating your social media, they can wait. They will follow. But never leave your kids.
Need to mark those sentences on my mind. That was my other brain who wrote it =P
Fighting, moms!
Well @kalibatacity feels like we are celebrating korean lunar new year (is it the same?). Anyway, after three new years in three months, I've finally decided what my resolution is. Yup, just one.
Actually I have plenty of them, but I prefer to announce just one resolution to the world.
My resolution for 2014 or whatever the latest year is to scheduling my cellphone's time. You may not know, but I used my phone to check my fb accound like hundreds of time in a day.
Am I famous? No.
Do I have lots of clients to be handled? No
Do I make money from it? Most of them, no.
And on the last new year eve, Malika told me and her father, "Ayah, stop smoking or you will be dead. Amy, stop playing around with your cellphone. play with me."
Bulls eye everybody.
It reminded me of one of the text of Melanie Subono that I edited a couple weeks ago. She wrote, Why do we bother to answer someone else outthere when you don't have any energy to give a nod, an answer to someone that sit in front of you?
Admit it, we do that for many time yet we are not the one who to be called gadget generation. Can you imagine what it would be when our kids grow bigger? Maybe an exactly the same scene as the movie Wall E.
I am not proud of my habit. Many times I asked myself:
"Why do you have to pretend to be busy with nothing, while you are the one who decided to resign from your office and said will use your time to take care your kids?"
"Why do you have to act busy with business when actually you haven't have that much demand either for baking nor editing? Why don't use your spare time with your kids before you are really busy with business?"
"Why do you have to open your social media account when you don't updating them?"
"Why ... ?" oh why ....
But that many times I also smile to my tought and continued tapping. This is a real bad habit.
These weeks I've tried to make my cell's time efficiently valuable. I actually love when I posted a blog and then reading people's comments, getting too excited to keep the trending. maybe I should hold it a little while. A pause moment for three hours, maybe?
And to make it valuable, I have to make sure that I do something that has something to do with the business. Not just becoming a passive internet geeks, not getting quite smarter but surely not being more popular or richer. Hey, you need to make a mark of your own, right?
Sometimes I used my cell as a denial. Especially when I got sleepy by the afternoon while the kids were still on fire. Just to make my eyes open, I kept busy with my cell. But unfortunately, it won't do for the kids because you are not BEING with them. They became even more brutal by this.
You are welcome to be late for any news, but don't be late to recognize what had/is/will happen/ed with your kids. Oh, I understand this sentence so much, but again in the name of denial or excuses I said to myself, "But sometimes I need a break!" Too bad I took a too long break. And still not feeling grateful about it.
Yes, grateful. I need to learn more about that. I should have feel grateful when I haven't had big business yet, so I can focusing myself with me and my kids. There are lots of mental homeworks to be accomplished. This is the time, maybe one day you will busy with business but at that time your kids might become your extra hand. =D
I know what my problem is, but too lazy too change it. I guess 'lazy' is the keyword for this year. No more laziness, Amy.
Keep the spirit. Burn it up! And run fast ... Beautifully ... And let your cells updating your social media, they can wait. They will follow. But never leave your kids.
Need to mark those sentences on my mind. That was my other brain who wrote it =P
Fighting, moms!
Selasa, 28 Januari 2014
Amy's Story: Malika and the Perfect Earrings
These last few months I've been busy with the same theme everytime I looked at Malika. To find the perfect earrings. Since she has reach three years old last March (and will be going to be four years old in a couple months ^.^), I decided to change her baby gold earrings. My sister said it would be harder to take them off if the kid has grown bigger. So, I took them off but couldn't find the perfect ones untill now.
A. Silver Drop Earrings
I decided not to give Malika any gold earrings, at least not untill she turns teenage. In this kind of age, kids tend to have less aware on earrings. They don't realise whether it still stuck in there or not. That is why I prefer any other earrings than gold earrings. Especially to protect Malika for any criminal attempts.
On Kalibata City there is a silver accesories booth and the drop earrings seemed attractive for kids and light. They are not expensive too and yet you are able sell them someday.
But I needed to buy it two times just to make sure that these are not suitable for Malika. The pendants kept off from the hooks and then they were gone somewhere else.
B. My Earrings
At first, I tought she could use my earrings collections. I don't have much of them since I've wear my veil permanently since I was 13.
They were cute gemstone design earrings. But not for long, it stucked somewhere and one of the pendant gone, again. But I wasn't worry because I have beadings collections and easily find the most suitable. But few days later, one of the earrings has gone. Too bad I don't have hooks collections. So I changed them with earrings that a little bit bigger and longer. The size of the hooks were also thicker, Malika didn't feel comfortable using it.
But those plastic earrings seems too big and heavy for her. After losing one of them, I change them.
C. Expensive Immitation Earrings vs Cheap Immitation Earrings
Then I went to another booth, trying to find another immitation earring. After some fashion failure with earrings with hooks, I prefer to choose stud earrings. (Well, actually I chose hoop earrings first but it didn't fit in her ears.) Hoping that it would ran smoother, you know a stud earring could be very uncomfortable because you can feel the studs touch your neck behind your ears.
But, beyond my expectation, it broke the next day. Guess, Malika felt too comfortable using it.
Feeling annoyed when your IDR50000 gone just like that, I decided to find some cheap plastic stud earrings. I could buy a dozen just for backups. But those kind of earrings broke even when you try to wear it.
Then I went back to drop earrings. This time, I still chose the cheap one with cute pendants. It went well quite long, untill ...
D. Beware of Little Brother
Yup, this little brother should have been on my beware list. Apparently, you can't be a cute big sister wearing drop earrings. It will be the target for your little brother when the two of you get into a fight.
And on one fine day, I noticed her ear bleed. There were quite deep scratches in the front and back side of her ear. I was afraid she would losing her ear. She is too young for fashion disaster. What a mom am I.
For days I forced Malika to let her ear get cleaned by alcohol and for that reasons I took of her earrings.
Guess, hoop earrings will be the best choice. Still find a time to search for them outside Kalibata City, I suppose. Hope, the earrings hole won't be closed untill that time come. Any ideas, moms?
A. Silver Drop Earrings
I decided not to give Malika any gold earrings, at least not untill she turns teenage. In this kind of age, kids tend to have less aware on earrings. They don't realise whether it still stuck in there or not. That is why I prefer any other earrings than gold earrings. Especially to protect Malika for any criminal attempts.
On Kalibata City there is a silver accesories booth and the drop earrings seemed attractive for kids and light. They are not expensive too and yet you are able sell them someday.
But I needed to buy it two times just to make sure that these are not suitable for Malika. The pendants kept off from the hooks and then they were gone somewhere else.
B. My Earrings
At first, I tought she could use my earrings collections. I don't have much of them since I've wear my veil permanently since I was 13.
They were cute gemstone design earrings. But not for long, it stucked somewhere and one of the pendant gone, again. But I wasn't worry because I have beadings collections and easily find the most suitable. But few days later, one of the earrings has gone. Too bad I don't have hooks collections. So I changed them with earrings that a little bit bigger and longer. The size of the hooks were also thicker, Malika didn't feel comfortable using it.
But those plastic earrings seems too big and heavy for her. After losing one of them, I change them.
C. Expensive Immitation Earrings vs Cheap Immitation Earrings
Then I went to another booth, trying to find another immitation earring. After some fashion failure with earrings with hooks, I prefer to choose stud earrings. (Well, actually I chose hoop earrings first but it didn't fit in her ears.) Hoping that it would ran smoother, you know a stud earring could be very uncomfortable because you can feel the studs touch your neck behind your ears.
But, beyond my expectation, it broke the next day. Guess, Malika felt too comfortable using it.
Feeling annoyed when your IDR50000 gone just like that, I decided to find some cheap plastic stud earrings. I could buy a dozen just for backups. But those kind of earrings broke even when you try to wear it.
Then I went back to drop earrings. This time, I still chose the cheap one with cute pendants. It went well quite long, untill ...
D. Beware of Little Brother
Yup, this little brother should have been on my beware list. Apparently, you can't be a cute big sister wearing drop earrings. It will be the target for your little brother when the two of you get into a fight.
And on one fine day, I noticed her ear bleed. There were quite deep scratches in the front and back side of her ear. I was afraid she would losing her ear. She is too young for fashion disaster. What a mom am I.
For days I forced Malika to let her ear get cleaned by alcohol and for that reasons I took of her earrings.
Guess, hoop earrings will be the best choice. Still find a time to search for them outside Kalibata City, I suppose. Hope, the earrings hole won't be closed untill that time come. Any ideas, moms?
Kamis, 09 Januari 2014
Amy's Story: Try to Let It Go
Kids's hobby has become more expensive nowadays. I am talking about how kids are allowed to operate a digital camera by themselves.
Actually I don't really agree of letting Malika hold a camera by herself, but Malika has shown her interest on taking pictures in a very early age and her father is also like photography, that's why I let her do that.
I believe that when you decided to give something to your kids, you also give your heart to let it go, in case it broke or gone. Ikhlas. Don't give them your home keys if you don't want to lose it. Don't give them things and threat them with a punishment.
I know that. I keep repeating in my head not to do anything that will make my kids less interest. Let them grow. I said repeatedly.
But when Malika was busy making selfie
pictures and she became too excited, the camera fell a couple times and at the last time it caused damage on the screen. I've seen this before but today was the worst and I am not sure that it will recover by itself (by another accident) just like before.
And when I mourned while holding the camera, Malika just said a quick 'sorry' and continued to play other thing. I was quite upset and asked her why did she feel easy about it. Didn't she know that it was valuable? And I have many sentences that my mom used to say everytime I broke things, it was in my tounge already. But Malika said, "I've said sorry and there is nothing I can do."
I felt like I want to bite her but I know it won't change a thing. Like she said, there is nothing we can do. And feeling unsatisfied, I decided not to play nor talk with her (and her brother) for almost an hour.
Well, I do have some housekeepings things to do, but at least I could do this and ignoring them that keep asking me to play with. And in my silence, my mind remembered my mom's childhood story.
My mom was born prematured, people said she looked like a rat because she was very small. But she survived but was finally able to walk by the age of four. As the oldest daughter in minang's society, my mom was asked to do houseworks in early age. And because her premature, she was hard to find her balance and kept breaking plates whenever she cleaned it. And that time, you should walk very far to the river to wash it. And my mom always remembered how her mom would get angry about it and would say mean words. While my father has almost the same story. He told us how his mom would take the breaking glass and tried to wipe it on his armpit just to scared him so he won't break it again next time. Such a horror.
But then my father said, that their parents had never learn about the life of things. When it broke or gone, it means it was the end of its life. And everything would died eventually. That's why, no need to feel hard about it.
This is true, but to really accept it, is hard to do. Hery himself is a person who can't keep his belongings. I barely found his childhood stuff, even his pictures, because he doesn't really pay attention about it. He has almost everything when he was kid but in the end he doesn't own it anymore. I said to him, if his wife doesn't has a life maybe he will lose it too.
While I like keeping things. Not because I have alot, but because I don't always have everything. And because I like to make some handy arts.
When I have kids, I am still not sure how am I suppose to do. I mean, I've seen how my nephew got obsessed on everything and kept her belongings tight. Somehow, I don't really like it. But seeing how Malika (and Safir) could easily break things and still feel happy after that, is also annoyed me.
So after almost an hour, I finally say something to her. that I was sad about the camera and she could not able to use it now. And if one day she will use a camera again (her father promised her intax cam on her birthday-hey I want it too), she need to promise to take good care of it. And when she saw tears in my eyes, at that time she also felt sad. I guess what really matter for her is not the thing but the human =) and who knows, maybe years from now she will capture many human soul from her camera.
#stilltrying
#my500words
Actually I don't really agree of letting Malika hold a camera by herself, but Malika has shown her interest on taking pictures in a very early age and her father is also like photography, that's why I let her do that.
I believe that when you decided to give something to your kids, you also give your heart to let it go, in case it broke or gone. Ikhlas. Don't give them your home keys if you don't want to lose it. Don't give them things and threat them with a punishment.
I know that. I keep repeating in my head not to do anything that will make my kids less interest. Let them grow. I said repeatedly.
But when Malika was busy making selfie
pictures and she became too excited, the camera fell a couple times and at the last time it caused damage on the screen. I've seen this before but today was the worst and I am not sure that it will recover by itself (by another accident) just like before.
And when I mourned while holding the camera, Malika just said a quick 'sorry' and continued to play other thing. I was quite upset and asked her why did she feel easy about it. Didn't she know that it was valuable? And I have many sentences that my mom used to say everytime I broke things, it was in my tounge already. But Malika said, "I've said sorry and there is nothing I can do."
I felt like I want to bite her but I know it won't change a thing. Like she said, there is nothing we can do. And feeling unsatisfied, I decided not to play nor talk with her (and her brother) for almost an hour.
Well, I do have some housekeepings things to do, but at least I could do this and ignoring them that keep asking me to play with. And in my silence, my mind remembered my mom's childhood story.
My mom was born prematured, people said she looked like a rat because she was very small. But she survived but was finally able to walk by the age of four. As the oldest daughter in minang's society, my mom was asked to do houseworks in early age. And because her premature, she was hard to find her balance and kept breaking plates whenever she cleaned it. And that time, you should walk very far to the river to wash it. And my mom always remembered how her mom would get angry about it and would say mean words. While my father has almost the same story. He told us how his mom would take the breaking glass and tried to wipe it on his armpit just to scared him so he won't break it again next time. Such a horror.
But then my father said, that their parents had never learn about the life of things. When it broke or gone, it means it was the end of its life. And everything would died eventually. That's why, no need to feel hard about it.
This is true, but to really accept it, is hard to do. Hery himself is a person who can't keep his belongings. I barely found his childhood stuff, even his pictures, because he doesn't really pay attention about it. He has almost everything when he was kid but in the end he doesn't own it anymore. I said to him, if his wife doesn't has a life maybe he will lose it too.
While I like keeping things. Not because I have alot, but because I don't always have everything. And because I like to make some handy arts.
When I have kids, I am still not sure how am I suppose to do. I mean, I've seen how my nephew got obsessed on everything and kept her belongings tight. Somehow, I don't really like it. But seeing how Malika (and Safir) could easily break things and still feel happy after that, is also annoyed me.
So after almost an hour, I finally say something to her. that I was sad about the camera and she could not able to use it now. And if one day she will use a camera again (her father promised her intax cam on her birthday-hey I want it too), she need to promise to take good care of it. And when she saw tears in my eyes, at that time she also felt sad. I guess what really matter for her is not the thing but the human =) and who knows, maybe years from now she will capture many human soul from her camera.
#stilltrying
#my500words
Minggu, 05 Januari 2014
Amy's Story: Sending the Wrong Messages
It has been my issue for years that I in some situation such as PMS would become a monster in front of the kids. I've tried so many different ways to change or to delete it completely. Because it didn't has the same mission with my goal to become a nice yet good mother for my kids.
Until one day, I screamed at Malika, yelling at her, asking her the reasons she kept doing things that made me upset . Why did I put her in front of the bthroom. But Malika was just in her silence, staring at me with her big eyes, making me even more angry. And really wanted to make her cry and knowing that it wouldnot change anything than adding another lousy noise to your head.
I was asking myself, she always does this. I mean, did she understand the word 'why'? Even Safir could answer it before he reached two years old. How come she never get the point? She is three years old!
She is only three years old. My other side said with its lazy tone. Damn.
If there is anyone to blame, that it was me. It always me.
Suddenly I felt itch on my head. I tried to breath deeper and slowly. OK, it's time to change the strategy.
After everything calmed down, well me precisely, I asked Malika to have a conversation with me. I couldn't do this alone though I insisted not to live with my parents nor using a nanny. It was just me and the kids, so I let the kids participate.
On the second tought, I don't really want to be a perfect nice mother. I even don't know how to imagine that. I want my kids to see how their mother could fixed herself and growth. Because that's what life is about. You're making mistakes and then you learn from it and become a better person after. Hopefully.
So, that night, while lying down on bed, I asked Malika what did she feel when I get angry. She didn't answer.
I asked another question, why did she never answer me. She didn't open her mouth.
"Are you scared or angry?"
"Scared," she answered whisperly.
OK, one thing that I don't need from my kids is the fact that they are afraid of me. I need to repair this situation. I've sending them the wrong message.
Then I explained, that everytime she didn't answer me, her big staring eyes were making me more angry. "Whenever you scared, tell me and I won't get angry anymore."
She nodded at that time.
And after that night, she is being more vocal that she used to be. She gave lots of reasons which sometimes could be annoying. It is better to have an argue situation rather than a one side yelling. And if she has lost reasons, she will asking sharply, "am I not allow to say anything?"
At that time, I usually hold myself to ask her shut her mouth. Talk, girl. Don't be like me. Say whay you want to say. Don't keep it inside, like me. Or you will suffer the rest of your life. You will learn to talk wise earlier.
She dares to remind me whenever I get angry, in a soft and hard ways. She will be the one that defense her little brother when I feel upset with him. And Safir does the same after looking at his sister. He will be the one that screamed out loud when I began to yell at Malika. And sometimes when I tickled Malika, he will try to separate us. He tought I would hurt his sister.
Well, Malika still needs to learn more about being brave and being unpolite. It's a progress. So do I. At least now I have a human brake, untill I can disfunction my monster mode off.
But there are lots of homeworks that I need to be done while the kids is growing faster than my progress. The bigger they are, the mere challenges that I need to face. Truly, being a parents is the hardest work of all. And you can't expect big salaries or any other compliment. All you need to do is pray and keep doing your best. May our kids will be protected from any bad things inside and outside their home. May God keeps them safe.
Until one day, I screamed at Malika, yelling at her, asking her the reasons she kept doing things that made me upset . Why did I put her in front of the bthroom. But Malika was just in her silence, staring at me with her big eyes, making me even more angry. And really wanted to make her cry and knowing that it wouldnot change anything than adding another lousy noise to your head.
I was asking myself, she always does this. I mean, did she understand the word 'why'? Even Safir could answer it before he reached two years old. How come she never get the point? She is three years old!
She is only three years old. My other side said with its lazy tone. Damn.
If there is anyone to blame, that it was me. It always me.
Suddenly I felt itch on my head. I tried to breath deeper and slowly. OK, it's time to change the strategy.
After everything calmed down, well me precisely, I asked Malika to have a conversation with me. I couldn't do this alone though I insisted not to live with my parents nor using a nanny. It was just me and the kids, so I let the kids participate.
On the second tought, I don't really want to be a perfect nice mother. I even don't know how to imagine that. I want my kids to see how their mother could fixed herself and growth. Because that's what life is about. You're making mistakes and then you learn from it and become a better person after. Hopefully.
So, that night, while lying down on bed, I asked Malika what did she feel when I get angry. She didn't answer.
I asked another question, why did she never answer me. She didn't open her mouth.
"Are you scared or angry?"
"Scared," she answered whisperly.
OK, one thing that I don't need from my kids is the fact that they are afraid of me. I need to repair this situation. I've sending them the wrong message.
Then I explained, that everytime she didn't answer me, her big staring eyes were making me more angry. "Whenever you scared, tell me and I won't get angry anymore."
She nodded at that time.
And after that night, she is being more vocal that she used to be. She gave lots of reasons which sometimes could be annoying. It is better to have an argue situation rather than a one side yelling. And if she has lost reasons, she will asking sharply, "am I not allow to say anything?"
At that time, I usually hold myself to ask her shut her mouth. Talk, girl. Don't be like me. Say whay you want to say. Don't keep it inside, like me. Or you will suffer the rest of your life. You will learn to talk wise earlier.
She dares to remind me whenever I get angry, in a soft and hard ways. She will be the one that defense her little brother when I feel upset with him. And Safir does the same after looking at his sister. He will be the one that screamed out loud when I began to yell at Malika. And sometimes when I tickled Malika, he will try to separate us. He tought I would hurt his sister.
Well, Malika still needs to learn more about being brave and being unpolite. It's a progress. So do I. At least now I have a human brake, untill I can disfunction my monster mode off.
But there are lots of homeworks that I need to be done while the kids is growing faster than my progress. The bigger they are, the mere challenges that I need to face. Truly, being a parents is the hardest work of all. And you can't expect big salaries or any other compliment. All you need to do is pray and keep doing your best. May our kids will be protected from any bad things inside and outside their home. May God keeps them safe.
Selasa, 31 Desember 2013
Amy's Story: short trips and educating kids- When Less is More
It has been my goal to take the kids for a short educative trips in Jakarta one a month. But at the end we were just go to less than seven places.
THE ZOO, RAGUNAN
We've been to Ragunan before, two years ago. But Malika asked to go there again as her birthday gift. And we finally went there with a complete team: ayah, amy, malika, safir, and om hanif.
But a light rain came soon we get into the zoo. Yup, rain has become the other member of our trip wherever we go. It was quite unconvenience actually to have an outdoor activities but there were black cloud above your head.
Before leaving Kalibata, I've prepared myself with lots of carrots, apples, bananas, to feed the animals. I know we were not suppose to do that, but we are not giving them snack, though. But unfortunately I didn't bring it enough because when we have a chance to have a closer contact with zebras, I've ran out supplies.
For me zebra was a magic horse with its stripes so I feel like disapointing them for not giving them the best.
There was one moment that Malika kept telling me everytime we talk about zoo. It was the moment when Safir got bitten by a rooster. Yup, we went to a zoo to see a rooster. Seeing her brother cried, Malika got angry and she kept kicking the cage, yelling "eat this, my shoe!"
We quickly tried to ease her before she really broke the cage.
The kids seemed to enjoy the trip but not the men. Because they were forced to become a 'kuli panggul' for Malika and Safir. I guess, next time bringing stroller is a must.
Other than feeding the pregnant elephant, playing with zebras and I was happy we could go there to see giraffe. Because a couple months after our visit, it died and Ragunan haven't had any new giraffe.
I am hoping that the children zoo would finished soon. Ragunan could be very awesome if it has the right management.
SEAWORLD, ANCOL
When one weekend Hery said that he need to meet a client in Ancol (because the client is the Ancol management), I asked him to come along. I promised him that we won't bother him. Because we will have fun in seaworld.
But the fact was ... It was hard to take two kids to seaworld.
Because the views were still to high for the kids, I need to hold one of them, while my eyes guarded the other. It was hard for me to take a picture, instead I was just record it. The dark room was also a burden to me because I really needed to sharpen my eyes watching Malika among lots of people in there.
She was so excited because we were just reading book about sea animal and at that time she was busy naming them and a non stop wow-ing.
I finally could ease my nerve when we went in to the mini movie. Usually Malika would scare of dark room and loud noise big picture, but because it wasn't that loud, those sister n brother played happily.
And after a while we cathched their father near the ecopark, and quickly went home right before the heavy rain fell.
SATRIA MANDALA MUSEUM
The best object when talking about educative place is museum. And the closest museum in the neighbourhood is Satria Mandala Museum. I remembered this when I read that there will be a meet n greet with Shaun the Sheep at Central Park.
Well, because I don't always have opportunity to go out, usually I take more than one destination. That's why I added Museum Satria Mandala on my list. This time I asked om hanif to come because it was workday.
Just when we step out of the taxi, the black cloud had greeted us. I quickly asked the kids to enjoy the planes that parked at the front area. Too bad we didn't enjoy it all because, yes you are right, the rain came down.
due to the rain, we decided to enjoy the inside
of the museum. The adoramas, the weapons gallery. It was quite a dillema when trying to explain to the kids about the killings, the use of guns, the wars ... It was like saying that it was ok to hurt people to protect yourself. Which is good, but I wonder would they use it as a reason to hurt each other to protect their toys.
The museum itself was in a very good condition. At the beginning. But when we walked deeper, there were spot that looked abandoned. Maybe the management are trying to do it one by one. For me, the adoramas was quite boring. Perhaps it reminded me of my study trips many years ago. It was boring, especially when u don't have boyfriend. But the kids seemed excited seeing all the small figures. I just hope there were facilities for strollers. Because it has a couple floor and there were only stairs.
Finished enjoying the adoramas, we arrive at the back side of the museum. There was a wide open space and the planes were parked chronologically. The rain still falled down. And because the parking area was covered by a roof, we decided to hang out there.
Malika was just watching Pororo the movies and there was plane on the movie. So she felt happy finding out the plane that looked almost the same.
It was just planes that parked but we spent more than half hour outthere.
The rain is getting harder and zuhur had come. So we decided to pray first and then hopefully the rain got lighter so we can move to another destination. But it went harder and harder. Because there was no place to get a fine dining for the kids, I said we must get out of here quickly. Om Hanif, with the umbrella, went out the museum, because the building lied far enough from the main street, looked for the cab. Thank God, he could find it in a short time. And off we go.
Everytime we talked about this, Malika always says that she amazed by the mal. For months I tought she was talking about the Central Park. But a couple weeks ago I finally found that what she mean was the building of the museum. U know, galleries with air conditioner inside, that is what she called mal.
And she is waiting for the next opportunity to go there once again.
MONAS
I was obsessed of going to Monas once again. As a Jakartans I don't have a clear memory of getting there. It was a long time ago.
So during the idl fitr holiday while Hery had back to work, with only rp70000,- in my pocket, and a double fried instant noodle, I brought the kids to Monas.
We went there by cab, the bird one and I spent rp50000,- to pay it.
There were lack of people when we got there. I even didn't know where we supposed to go. My feet got hurt because the day before Safir let my guitar fell and it landed its buttons right on my foot. That condition made me couldn't able to think well. So instead of getting inside the Monas, we were just sitting under the Diponegoro's statue. And the rain fell, what the .... Malika just started eating the noodles but she didn't complain when I asked her to open the umbrella and quickly walk to the Transjakarta station. With twenty thousand rupiahs in my pocket, what can u expect?
Days after that I finally found out that actually there are more economic yet easier to get if its about transportation to Monas. Because at that time, I made a wrong decision taking the bus station near Gambir. It made us went to another sode before we finally get into the Jakarta-Blok M route.
But the positive side was Malika and Safir got a chance to ride three different colour of transjakarta. The first and the second bus were very empty, Malika was able to enjoy the outside view while Safir was busied breastfeed. After we step out at Semanggi, we need to walk very far to reach the other bus stop, I forgot the name. First, I was quite worry that Malika would ask to get carried because she was tired. But what a sweet of her, she was enjoying walking with the long umbrella pretending to ride a horse along the bridge.
It was a long waiting at that moment at the transjakarta station. We were in the middle of the big streets and the glass door stayed open. I need to repeatedly remind the kids to stay away from the door. Especially when it was a rain hard and very windy.
After eating all the noodle, the bus arrived. It was very full. Of course as a woman with two kids, the officer forced a passenger to give the priority seat. He seemed to be forced when he got up. I had refuse it but the officer insist. I know it will harder for me to explain what will happen if I sit.
Yes, Safir would ask for another breastfeeding time. I mean, hey boy, it was very full in here and your sister was barely standing straight. But ... At the end I let the kids sat on my laps, the one enjoyed the breastfeed while the other tried to hold on.
When we were finally stopped the mikrolet at Pancoran, i felt relieve. We will back home soon. And it was very soon because Malika had just close her eyes right before the mikrolet ended the journey. She even closed her eyes again when I woke her up and drag her to come out. Someone need to be awake because we have still a few hundred meters to walk before we get to our bed.
It was like a silly trip. But though we finally went there once again in a normal condition, it was the first trip that Malika kept telling me. It was a moment when she felt very proud of herself not whining during the trip though it was a hard one. Good girl.
KOTA TUA
After Hery had a new camera, weekend has become a moment to find a good spot to take a picture. So, he became less excited to go to someone else's. That's why I asked him to go to Kota Tua. I think I need more museums to see. And Kota Tua is very easy and cheap to reach.
After getting off the train in Kota, we just needed to take a walk. But I was very disapointed knpwing that the museums were closed due to renovation. So we were just hanging around at the front yard. There were crowds of people. And I amazed on how people use their creativity to get money. The colourful ontels, the human statues, and the kuda lumping show. Ok, the last one was less innovative because though it was traditional but it contain lots of violence. The sounds of the wipe made Malika and Safir stopped. At first, I really didn't want to let them see it but my mind confused of trying to inform the kids about the traditional value or about the antiviolence. But finally at the last moment I let them see it and I regreted it. Never let your kids saw that kind of attraction. Malika got scared while Safir got excited.
Because the museum Jakarta and museum Wayang were unopened, I almost felt undermood. But while we take a walk to find a place to have lunch, actually we were trying to find KFC, we found this place. Waroeng Batavia. It was a place to eat using the old building. We use the second floor and the kids got excited with the big windows and their father got happy because he could have good spots. While me enjoying the food which was very good. Beyond my expectation. I tought it will a so so taste.
That day, the sun was shining bright. But we got very tired because there were too many people around. And finally we took a cab to come back home and we all fell asleep in it.
TAMAN MAKAM PAHLAWAN
On one weekend we were bored. Didn't know whereelse we go without spending too much money. And my memory told me one place that we always failed to come. To feed the deers in taman makam pahlawan. It has been a while since the deers never showed up again in the park. But Hery said that those deers has been out of the cage now. So off we go there. I first bought some carrots but I knew then that there was someone who sold it there. And cheaper too.
By using m16, we quickly arrived at the spot. Near the red light. There were plenty of deers and our carrots got quickly eaten. Deers are surely beautiful. Especially when they have horns. Touching the horn felt like magic to me. You know, it felt like touching a tree but it moved.
Safir seemed to enjoy giving them carrots untill they were full and refuse to eat. Malika was busied telling the deer with the horn not to take the carrots that she gave to the smaller deer.
Finished with the carrots, I found out that next to the lake in Taman Makam Pahlawan there was an event been going on. It was heroes day. So we went there because the lake area didn't open regularly. We oftenly felt disapoonted seeing the locked fences after a long walk from the apartment. But at the moment, seemed everything that has been canceled, accomplished. I hope the management of the Taman Makam Pahlawan could make it better. It was a potential spot.
SOEKARNO HATTA AIRPORT
One day, Hery needed to go to Bali and the day he went back to Jakarta I decided to greeted him earlier. Malika tought that she will be go to the museum again and refuse to go to the airport. But I finally 'forced' her to come.
But when we got there I was the one who amazed. The airport has changed. I was very left behind. That's why it took me more than a half hour to find the safe spot for the kids.
The airport surely has wide space but people with baggage were a dangerous traffic for the bouncing kids like mine.
But we got it, thanks for delaying arrival. It was the smoking area where we can see the planes are parking, landing, taking off ... And it was very windy.
After we got home, after a long and expensive ride, Malika finally is able to play the planes toys in an approriate ways. But still she chose the Satria Mandala because she can touch the plane though they are not as big as the airport.
Someday baby, we will get on the plane. Someday.
Fiuuuh ... I guess that was it. These short trips reminds me of what Donna Agnesia said, 'Parents oftenly think too hard about where they want to spent with the kids. While the kids actually just need us to play with them no matter where they are.'
2014? It will be more exciting.
THE ZOO, RAGUNAN
We've been to Ragunan before, two years ago. But Malika asked to go there again as her birthday gift. And we finally went there with a complete team: ayah, amy, malika, safir, and om hanif.
But a light rain came soon we get into the zoo. Yup, rain has become the other member of our trip wherever we go. It was quite unconvenience actually to have an outdoor activities but there were black cloud above your head.
Before leaving Kalibata, I've prepared myself with lots of carrots, apples, bananas, to feed the animals. I know we were not suppose to do that, but we are not giving them snack, though. But unfortunately I didn't bring it enough because when we have a chance to have a closer contact with zebras, I've ran out supplies.
For me zebra was a magic horse with its stripes so I feel like disapointing them for not giving them the best.
There was one moment that Malika kept telling me everytime we talk about zoo. It was the moment when Safir got bitten by a rooster. Yup, we went to a zoo to see a rooster. Seeing her brother cried, Malika got angry and she kept kicking the cage, yelling "eat this, my shoe!"
We quickly tried to ease her before she really broke the cage.
The kids seemed to enjoy the trip but not the men. Because they were forced to become a 'kuli panggul' for Malika and Safir. I guess, next time bringing stroller is a must.
Other than feeding the pregnant elephant, playing with zebras and I was happy we could go there to see giraffe. Because a couple months after our visit, it died and Ragunan haven't had any new giraffe.
I am hoping that the children zoo would finished soon. Ragunan could be very awesome if it has the right management.
SEAWORLD, ANCOL
When one weekend Hery said that he need to meet a client in Ancol (because the client is the Ancol management), I asked him to come along. I promised him that we won't bother him. Because we will have fun in seaworld.
But the fact was ... It was hard to take two kids to seaworld.
Because the views were still to high for the kids, I need to hold one of them, while my eyes guarded the other. It was hard for me to take a picture, instead I was just record it. The dark room was also a burden to me because I really needed to sharpen my eyes watching Malika among lots of people in there.
She was so excited because we were just reading book about sea animal and at that time she was busy naming them and a non stop wow-ing.
I finally could ease my nerve when we went in to the mini movie. Usually Malika would scare of dark room and loud noise big picture, but because it wasn't that loud, those sister n brother played happily.
And after a while we cathched their father near the ecopark, and quickly went home right before the heavy rain fell.
SATRIA MANDALA MUSEUM
The best object when talking about educative place is museum. And the closest museum in the neighbourhood is Satria Mandala Museum. I remembered this when I read that there will be a meet n greet with Shaun the Sheep at Central Park.
Well, because I don't always have opportunity to go out, usually I take more than one destination. That's why I added Museum Satria Mandala on my list. This time I asked om hanif to come because it was workday.
Just when we step out of the taxi, the black cloud had greeted us. I quickly asked the kids to enjoy the planes that parked at the front area. Too bad we didn't enjoy it all because, yes you are right, the rain came down.
due to the rain, we decided to enjoy the inside
of the museum. The adoramas, the weapons gallery. It was quite a dillema when trying to explain to the kids about the killings, the use of guns, the wars ... It was like saying that it was ok to hurt people to protect yourself. Which is good, but I wonder would they use it as a reason to hurt each other to protect their toys.
The museum itself was in a very good condition. At the beginning. But when we walked deeper, there were spot that looked abandoned. Maybe the management are trying to do it one by one. For me, the adoramas was quite boring. Perhaps it reminded me of my study trips many years ago. It was boring, especially when u don't have boyfriend. But the kids seemed excited seeing all the small figures. I just hope there were facilities for strollers. Because it has a couple floor and there were only stairs.
Finished enjoying the adoramas, we arrive at the back side of the museum. There was a wide open space and the planes were parked chronologically. The rain still falled down. And because the parking area was covered by a roof, we decided to hang out there.
Malika was just watching Pororo the movies and there was plane on the movie. So she felt happy finding out the plane that looked almost the same.
It was just planes that parked but we spent more than half hour outthere.
The rain is getting harder and zuhur had come. So we decided to pray first and then hopefully the rain got lighter so we can move to another destination. But it went harder and harder. Because there was no place to get a fine dining for the kids, I said we must get out of here quickly. Om Hanif, with the umbrella, went out the museum, because the building lied far enough from the main street, looked for the cab. Thank God, he could find it in a short time. And off we go.
Everytime we talked about this, Malika always says that she amazed by the mal. For months I tought she was talking about the Central Park. But a couple weeks ago I finally found that what she mean was the building of the museum. U know, galleries with air conditioner inside, that is what she called mal.
And she is waiting for the next opportunity to go there once again.
MONAS
I was obsessed of going to Monas once again. As a Jakartans I don't have a clear memory of getting there. It was a long time ago.
So during the idl fitr holiday while Hery had back to work, with only rp70000,- in my pocket, and a double fried instant noodle, I brought the kids to Monas.
We went there by cab, the bird one and I spent rp50000,- to pay it.
There were lack of people when we got there. I even didn't know where we supposed to go. My feet got hurt because the day before Safir let my guitar fell and it landed its buttons right on my foot. That condition made me couldn't able to think well. So instead of getting inside the Monas, we were just sitting under the Diponegoro's statue. And the rain fell, what the .... Malika just started eating the noodles but she didn't complain when I asked her to open the umbrella and quickly walk to the Transjakarta station. With twenty thousand rupiahs in my pocket, what can u expect?
Days after that I finally found out that actually there are more economic yet easier to get if its about transportation to Monas. Because at that time, I made a wrong decision taking the bus station near Gambir. It made us went to another sode before we finally get into the Jakarta-Blok M route.
But the positive side was Malika and Safir got a chance to ride three different colour of transjakarta. The first and the second bus were very empty, Malika was able to enjoy the outside view while Safir was busied breastfeed. After we step out at Semanggi, we need to walk very far to reach the other bus stop, I forgot the name. First, I was quite worry that Malika would ask to get carried because she was tired. But what a sweet of her, she was enjoying walking with the long umbrella pretending to ride a horse along the bridge.
It was a long waiting at that moment at the transjakarta station. We were in the middle of the big streets and the glass door stayed open. I need to repeatedly remind the kids to stay away from the door. Especially when it was a rain hard and very windy.
After eating all the noodle, the bus arrived. It was very full. Of course as a woman with two kids, the officer forced a passenger to give the priority seat. He seemed to be forced when he got up. I had refuse it but the officer insist. I know it will harder for me to explain what will happen if I sit.
Yes, Safir would ask for another breastfeeding time. I mean, hey boy, it was very full in here and your sister was barely standing straight. But ... At the end I let the kids sat on my laps, the one enjoyed the breastfeed while the other tried to hold on.
When we were finally stopped the mikrolet at Pancoran, i felt relieve. We will back home soon. And it was very soon because Malika had just close her eyes right before the mikrolet ended the journey. She even closed her eyes again when I woke her up and drag her to come out. Someone need to be awake because we have still a few hundred meters to walk before we get to our bed.
It was like a silly trip. But though we finally went there once again in a normal condition, it was the first trip that Malika kept telling me. It was a moment when she felt very proud of herself not whining during the trip though it was a hard one. Good girl.
KOTA TUA
After Hery had a new camera, weekend has become a moment to find a good spot to take a picture. So, he became less excited to go to someone else's. That's why I asked him to go to Kota Tua. I think I need more museums to see. And Kota Tua is very easy and cheap to reach.
After getting off the train in Kota, we just needed to take a walk. But I was very disapointed knpwing that the museums were closed due to renovation. So we were just hanging around at the front yard. There were crowds of people. And I amazed on how people use their creativity to get money. The colourful ontels, the human statues, and the kuda lumping show. Ok, the last one was less innovative because though it was traditional but it contain lots of violence. The sounds of the wipe made Malika and Safir stopped. At first, I really didn't want to let them see it but my mind confused of trying to inform the kids about the traditional value or about the antiviolence. But finally at the last moment I let them see it and I regreted it. Never let your kids saw that kind of attraction. Malika got scared while Safir got excited.
Because the museum Jakarta and museum Wayang were unopened, I almost felt undermood. But while we take a walk to find a place to have lunch, actually we were trying to find KFC, we found this place. Waroeng Batavia. It was a place to eat using the old building. We use the second floor and the kids got excited with the big windows and their father got happy because he could have good spots. While me enjoying the food which was very good. Beyond my expectation. I tought it will a so so taste.
That day, the sun was shining bright. But we got very tired because there were too many people around. And finally we took a cab to come back home and we all fell asleep in it.
TAMAN MAKAM PAHLAWAN
On one weekend we were bored. Didn't know whereelse we go without spending too much money. And my memory told me one place that we always failed to come. To feed the deers in taman makam pahlawan. It has been a while since the deers never showed up again in the park. But Hery said that those deers has been out of the cage now. So off we go there. I first bought some carrots but I knew then that there was someone who sold it there. And cheaper too.
By using m16, we quickly arrived at the spot. Near the red light. There were plenty of deers and our carrots got quickly eaten. Deers are surely beautiful. Especially when they have horns. Touching the horn felt like magic to me. You know, it felt like touching a tree but it moved.
Safir seemed to enjoy giving them carrots untill they were full and refuse to eat. Malika was busied telling the deer with the horn not to take the carrots that she gave to the smaller deer.
Finished with the carrots, I found out that next to the lake in Taman Makam Pahlawan there was an event been going on. It was heroes day. So we went there because the lake area didn't open regularly. We oftenly felt disapoonted seeing the locked fences after a long walk from the apartment. But at the moment, seemed everything that has been canceled, accomplished. I hope the management of the Taman Makam Pahlawan could make it better. It was a potential spot.
SOEKARNO HATTA AIRPORT
One day, Hery needed to go to Bali and the day he went back to Jakarta I decided to greeted him earlier. Malika tought that she will be go to the museum again and refuse to go to the airport. But I finally 'forced' her to come.
But when we got there I was the one who amazed. The airport has changed. I was very left behind. That's why it took me more than a half hour to find the safe spot for the kids.
The airport surely has wide space but people with baggage were a dangerous traffic for the bouncing kids like mine.
But we got it, thanks for delaying arrival. It was the smoking area where we can see the planes are parking, landing, taking off ... And it was very windy.
After we got home, after a long and expensive ride, Malika finally is able to play the planes toys in an approriate ways. But still she chose the Satria Mandala because she can touch the plane though they are not as big as the airport.
Someday baby, we will get on the plane. Someday.
Fiuuuh ... I guess that was it. These short trips reminds me of what Donna Agnesia said, 'Parents oftenly think too hard about where they want to spent with the kids. While the kids actually just need us to play with them no matter where they are.'
2014? It will be more exciting.
Jumat, 13 Desember 2013
(Repost) Amy's Story: Aku Ada karena Aku Iri
(tulisan ini dibuat pada Agustus 2010. Masih kerja. Anak baru satu. Dan masih tinggal sama ortu. Lucu juga sbg pengingat ketika tanduk mulai kebanyakan tumbuh ketemu bocah-bocah tengil)
Postingan ini dibuat untuk menjawab postingan Roosie. Well, sebenarnya ga tepat juga disebut menjawab, melainkan hendak menunjukkan sisi lain untuk tema yang sama.
Aku adalah bungsu dari empat bersaudara. Walau lahir di negeri kompeni sana, tetapi fakta menunjukkan bahwa masa pertumbuhanku (dan hingga sekarang) adalah di Indonesia. Iya, Indonesia, tempat orang-orang bekerja untuk sesuap nasi, bukan untuk tujuan wisata liburan tahunan selanjutnya bersama keluarga. Kondisi ini menempatkanku pada status anak dari dua orangtua yang bekerja. Kala itu, tidak banyak orangtua yang bekerja dua-duanya. Setidaknya untuk angkatanku.
Sehingga aku selalu iri ketika main ke rumah teman selalu ada mamanya di rumah dan siap menyiapkan lauk tambahan untuk teman anaknya. Sedangkan aku, lauk sudah ada jatahnya masing-masing karena mama sudah masak jauh-jauh hari dan kalau ada teman mau makan di rumah cukup dikasih telor mata sapi (kebayang donk, aku makan ayam sedangkan temanku hanya makan telor).
Mama selalu menekankan untuk telepon ke rumah kalau mau pergi ke mana saja. Bahkan ketika handphone sudah bertebaran di mana-mana mama hanya ingin si anak yang menginfokan ke orangtua, bukan orangtua yang tanya-tanya. Kalau papaku sebaliknya. Dia masih mau mencari aku kalau aku pulang terlambat--waktu SD. Ketika sudah dewasa, papa biasanya tetap terjaga hingga aku tiba di rumah (walau dia tidak bilang, aku tahu dia sedang menungguku).
Sebagai anak dari kedua orangtua bekerja, aku tidak hanya menemukan bahwa aku jadi lebih mandiri, tetapi juga fakta aku sering diledek 'anak mba' sama guru-guru karena si mba yang akan datang kalau aku sakit di sekolah, juga fakta lain... tidak ada orang dewasa yang dapat melindungi aku di rumah. Harus sendirian berhadapan dengan om-om mesum di sekolah atau di rumah dengan kepolosan anak kecil dan buntutnya masih berjuang mengatasi trauma yang sering muncul terlebih setelah menikah (dan Hery jadi sering korban KDRT karenanya). Aku pun jadi parnoan.
Aku merindukan sosok ibu rumah tangga yang tetap bisa cari uang di rumah tetapi juga membuat kue paling lezat bagi anak-anaknya. Orang dewasa pelindungku.
Setelah menjadi orangtua di kota Jakarta yang kejam ini, praktis aku tetap harus bekerja dan meninggalkan Malika 12 jam setiap harinya. Keadaan ini senantiasa dibanding-bandingkan sama mama dulu. Ya iyalah, beliau bisa kerja dari jam 6 malam dan pulang jam 12 malam dengan gaji lebih tinggi. Itu di Belanda. Lha kalau di sini yang bisa begitu cuma pegawai klub malam.
Selama 12 jam itu, Malika akan bersama ayahnya hingga pukul 2 siang--karena Hery jadi asisten redaktur jadi ga perlu keluar pagi2. Pasca jam 2 akan diserahterimakan ke mama hingga aku tiba di rumah sekitar pukul 7 malam. Dan Malika tidur jam 9 malam.
Jadi kalau dihitung-hitung, waktuku bersama Malika tidak sebanyak ayahnya. Dan itu membuatku iri. Walau aku setiap hari telepon untuk menanyakan kondisi Malika (dan dikeluhkan sama mama), tetapi itu tidak sebanding dengan menyaksikan setiap hal baru yang dilakukan Malika. Padahal sekaranglah masa-masanya. Masa-masa menakjubkan melihat seorang bayi berjuang untuk bisa tengkurap lalu merangkak. Bayi yang begitu antusias untuk menikmati kehidupan.
Aku merasa berbuat begitu banyak karena dasar cinta. Tetap bekerja karena ingin Malika mendapat kehidupan yang lebih baik. Bangun tengah malam untuk perah susu hingga aku jadi kurang tidur. Tidak bisa ke mana-mana ketika weekend karena Malika belum bisa dibawa nonton bioskop dan tidak mau juga meninggalkan Malika di rumah saat weekend karena aku tidak bisa membelikan Malika waktu. Sedangkan Hery, tidak kekurangan jam tidur, jam kerja lebih sedikit, tetapi punya banyak waktu dengan Malika. Bahkan besok dia masih bisa nonton konser Ian Brown dan Kula Shaker.
Aku memang berusaha tetap ada karena aku iri. Walau itu berarti tidak pergi ke mana-mana tanpa Malika.
Betapa aku ingin mengamalkan sharing dari Gobind Vashdev, penuhi tangki cinta Anda. Karena aku tidak ingin mencintai Malika tetapi ingin Malika merasa dicintai.
Postingan ini dibuat untuk menjawab postingan Roosie. Well, sebenarnya ga tepat juga disebut menjawab, melainkan hendak menunjukkan sisi lain untuk tema yang sama.
Aku adalah bungsu dari empat bersaudara. Walau lahir di negeri kompeni sana, tetapi fakta menunjukkan bahwa masa pertumbuhanku (dan hingga sekarang) adalah di Indonesia. Iya, Indonesia, tempat orang-orang bekerja untuk sesuap nasi, bukan untuk tujuan wisata liburan tahunan selanjutnya bersama keluarga. Kondisi ini menempatkanku pada status anak dari dua orangtua yang bekerja. Kala itu, tidak banyak orangtua yang bekerja dua-duanya. Setidaknya untuk angkatanku.
Sehingga aku selalu iri ketika main ke rumah teman selalu ada mamanya di rumah dan siap menyiapkan lauk tambahan untuk teman anaknya. Sedangkan aku, lauk sudah ada jatahnya masing-masing karena mama sudah masak jauh-jauh hari dan kalau ada teman mau makan di rumah cukup dikasih telor mata sapi (kebayang donk, aku makan ayam sedangkan temanku hanya makan telor).
Mama selalu menekankan untuk telepon ke rumah kalau mau pergi ke mana saja. Bahkan ketika handphone sudah bertebaran di mana-mana mama hanya ingin si anak yang menginfokan ke orangtua, bukan orangtua yang tanya-tanya. Kalau papaku sebaliknya. Dia masih mau mencari aku kalau aku pulang terlambat--waktu SD. Ketika sudah dewasa, papa biasanya tetap terjaga hingga aku tiba di rumah (walau dia tidak bilang, aku tahu dia sedang menungguku).
Sebagai anak dari kedua orangtua bekerja, aku tidak hanya menemukan bahwa aku jadi lebih mandiri, tetapi juga fakta aku sering diledek 'anak mba' sama guru-guru karena si mba yang akan datang kalau aku sakit di sekolah, juga fakta lain... tidak ada orang dewasa yang dapat melindungi aku di rumah. Harus sendirian berhadapan dengan om-om mesum di sekolah atau di rumah dengan kepolosan anak kecil dan buntutnya masih berjuang mengatasi trauma yang sering muncul terlebih setelah menikah (dan Hery jadi sering korban KDRT karenanya). Aku pun jadi parnoan.
Aku merindukan sosok ibu rumah tangga yang tetap bisa cari uang di rumah tetapi juga membuat kue paling lezat bagi anak-anaknya. Orang dewasa pelindungku.
Setelah menjadi orangtua di kota Jakarta yang kejam ini, praktis aku tetap harus bekerja dan meninggalkan Malika 12 jam setiap harinya. Keadaan ini senantiasa dibanding-bandingkan sama mama dulu. Ya iyalah, beliau bisa kerja dari jam 6 malam dan pulang jam 12 malam dengan gaji lebih tinggi. Itu di Belanda. Lha kalau di sini yang bisa begitu cuma pegawai klub malam.
Selama 12 jam itu, Malika akan bersama ayahnya hingga pukul 2 siang--karena Hery jadi asisten redaktur jadi ga perlu keluar pagi2. Pasca jam 2 akan diserahterimakan ke mama hingga aku tiba di rumah sekitar pukul 7 malam. Dan Malika tidur jam 9 malam.
Jadi kalau dihitung-hitung, waktuku bersama Malika tidak sebanyak ayahnya. Dan itu membuatku iri. Walau aku setiap hari telepon untuk menanyakan kondisi Malika (dan dikeluhkan sama mama), tetapi itu tidak sebanding dengan menyaksikan setiap hal baru yang dilakukan Malika. Padahal sekaranglah masa-masanya. Masa-masa menakjubkan melihat seorang bayi berjuang untuk bisa tengkurap lalu merangkak. Bayi yang begitu antusias untuk menikmati kehidupan.
Aku merasa berbuat begitu banyak karena dasar cinta. Tetap bekerja karena ingin Malika mendapat kehidupan yang lebih baik. Bangun tengah malam untuk perah susu hingga aku jadi kurang tidur. Tidak bisa ke mana-mana ketika weekend karena Malika belum bisa dibawa nonton bioskop dan tidak mau juga meninggalkan Malika di rumah saat weekend karena aku tidak bisa membelikan Malika waktu. Sedangkan Hery, tidak kekurangan jam tidur, jam kerja lebih sedikit, tetapi punya banyak waktu dengan Malika. Bahkan besok dia masih bisa nonton konser Ian Brown dan Kula Shaker.
Aku memang berusaha tetap ada karena aku iri. Walau itu berarti tidak pergi ke mana-mana tanpa Malika.
Betapa aku ingin mengamalkan sharing dari Gobind Vashdev, penuhi tangki cinta Anda. Karena aku tidak ingin mencintai Malika tetapi ingin Malika merasa dicintai.
Kamis, 12 Desember 2013
(Repost) Amy's story: Adaptation
I really want to write about this after I had a little bit rough discussion with a friend who is also a mom but avoid to meet her almost 1 year old kid with mine because of the pollution. Actually I want to make the argument longer by saying things like the pollutant in Kalibata is not as thick as Tj. Priok, I believe. I mean I'm not living in an industrial area. But, I prefer saying it here rather than in her status =D
No, actually this kind of thing makes me think twice. When I try to move a little backward then I will see that my friend consideration was fit to her. I mean she is not really a Jakartans and thinks that her campus is the center of civilitation, so I guess I should understand her uncovenience of things. When she said she doesn't want to make her baby uncomfortable, I believe it was her who feel uncomfortable. hey, my brother took his 9 months baby from indonesia all the way to england in a 16 hours flight.
To be able to adapt is every parents homework for their kids. If the parents feel fine, so does the kids. Well not every adaptation runs smooth, but you can through this, together.
Me my self is a kind of person who have a kind of level of insecure. I have problems with small area n crowded people inside it. So, I prefer getting on a cab rather than getting on somebody's livina with more than 10 peeps on it. That's why I don't really like a crowded neighbourhood. So when we attended arisan at north jakarta, I prepared myself a number of drinks. Because I know, the kids won't eat a thing due to the heat, the noisy, and all the 'sumpek' things. If it is important then u should attend it, I mean you can't say: i don't want to come to ur house because it's tiny and has no airconditioner. And you will never know what to prepared untill u really doing it.
For example when the first time Malika went to Bandung, she was still 4 months old. We were using office car and then a travel car to come back home. A day later, Malika cried all the time. At that day, we realized that a baby should have a massage after having a long travel especially when she was only on my arms during the road. Did I refuse to come to Bandung? No. I still did. And finally we have a better option to go there. By train. Because Malika oftenly throw up when using a travel car. U see? Small area, lots of people. That was my problem =D.
When Malika had a baby brother it took a long time for her to adapt. Especially we were moving in to the apartment just a month later. She didn't say she doesn't like her brother nor the house, when she could hardly sleep tight untill morning. Whining all the time. But did we move back to Tebet? No. at this situation, hugs and comforted words are really helpful. Though, it took me quite a while before realizing it.
I remember one of Oprah show's about a dwarf family. Even they have their own house, they didn't design it in their standard. They were using normal standard. The father said that the reality out there is everything is normal standard, so they need to learn it first at home. That was bold for me.
It's like when u say to your kids, don't run or you will fall. I'd rather say, run and then u will learn not to fall, hard. But that's me. Because every kids are unique, then it makes every parents are unique. Enjoy the life lessons, parents =)
(as written on my fb's note March 16th)
No, actually this kind of thing makes me think twice. When I try to move a little backward then I will see that my friend consideration was fit to her. I mean she is not really a Jakartans and thinks that her campus is the center of civilitation, so I guess I should understand her uncovenience of things. When she said she doesn't want to make her baby uncomfortable, I believe it was her who feel uncomfortable. hey, my brother took his 9 months baby from indonesia all the way to england in a 16 hours flight.
To be able to adapt is every parents homework for their kids. If the parents feel fine, so does the kids. Well not every adaptation runs smooth, but you can through this, together.
Me my self is a kind of person who have a kind of level of insecure. I have problems with small area n crowded people inside it. So, I prefer getting on a cab rather than getting on somebody's livina with more than 10 peeps on it. That's why I don't really like a crowded neighbourhood. So when we attended arisan at north jakarta, I prepared myself a number of drinks. Because I know, the kids won't eat a thing due to the heat, the noisy, and all the 'sumpek' things. If it is important then u should attend it, I mean you can't say: i don't want to come to ur house because it's tiny and has no airconditioner. And you will never know what to prepared untill u really doing it.
For example when the first time Malika went to Bandung, she was still 4 months old. We were using office car and then a travel car to come back home. A day later, Malika cried all the time. At that day, we realized that a baby should have a massage after having a long travel especially when she was only on my arms during the road. Did I refuse to come to Bandung? No. I still did. And finally we have a better option to go there. By train. Because Malika oftenly throw up when using a travel car. U see? Small area, lots of people. That was my problem =D.
When Malika had a baby brother it took a long time for her to adapt. Especially we were moving in to the apartment just a month later. She didn't say she doesn't like her brother nor the house, when she could hardly sleep tight untill morning. Whining all the time. But did we move back to Tebet? No. at this situation, hugs and comforted words are really helpful. Though, it took me quite a while before realizing it.
I remember one of Oprah show's about a dwarf family. Even they have their own house, they didn't design it in their standard. They were using normal standard. The father said that the reality out there is everything is normal standard, so they need to learn it first at home. That was bold for me.
It's like when u say to your kids, don't run or you will fall. I'd rather say, run and then u will learn not to fall, hard. But that's me. Because every kids are unique, then it makes every parents are unique. Enjoy the life lessons, parents =)
(as written on my fb's note March 16th)
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